reclaiming christmas

I am extremely happy that it seems like I have my plan for Christmas Eve all sorted already. I will once again spend the evening with a dear friend who feels about Christmas the same way I do (or similar enough).

Usually, even only thinking of Christmas gives me stomach-ache. there are many reasons why I am neither a fan of the holiday itself nor of the traditions that surround it. Every year, something else is the most pressing issue for me. This year, it’s the fact that the old idea of a wedding as a rite of passage is still encoded in the way people think about Christmas: Regarding Christmas traditions, you are a child until you marry (or enter a serious monogamous romantic partnership) and/or have children. Well, I am probably never going to get married, I most likely do not want children, and in case I do not enter another partnership, I am not planning on spending this day Bridget Jones-style for the next decades.

You know what? I am an adult. I am an adult when I am single and I am an adult when I am in a partnership. And I am not very happy with the idea that what is expected of me will forever depend on whether there is a man I am having sex with. Not to speak of the possibility that I might be with a woman some day; no idea what the protocol would be in that case.

From my point of view, family is more than blood relations or sex partners. Some of my friends are more clearly family to me than some of my relatives ever will be. And maybe they, too, deserve that we have a little family reunion on Christmas Eve.


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